Grandparents Helping Grandparents Help the Grandkids

By Abby Ellin

As the founder of the 008 Investment Club in New York, Diane Terman Felenstein had to learn all about money. That was a big deal. Before she started the club, she said, her financial knowledge was "nonexistent."

But that was 1995. She would soon become well acquainted with stock portfolios, insurance and estate planning. The 008 Club, which was for women only, inspired "The Money Club," a book published by Simon & Schuster in 1998 that landed on various bestseller lists. By the time the group disbanded in 2000, Ms. Terman Felenstein had a wealth of fiscal knowledge.

Over time, the lives of many of the former members have changed. Some are now divorced; others are widowed. Some have switched careers; some have left the city. But 13 of the original 16 members have this in common: they are grandparents and are devoted to their grandchildren. And that started the wheels spinning in Ms. Terman Felenstein's head.

"Grandparents are very different from when I was growing up: you loved them, but they weren't necessarily integrated into your life, " said Ms. Terman Felenstein, a New York public relations executive who is now in her early 60's and has four grandchildren. She often talks about her own grandmother, who was a constant during her childhood, and she spends considerable time with her own grandchildren.

"Today, summer camps have weekends for grandparents," she said. "Hotels run grandparent specials. In many communities, the grandparents are raising grandchildren, and they don't have the resources to do it."

Her goal was to use her financial skills to help lower-income grandparents who are raising grandchildren, as well as to educate herself about the financial issues of aging. What are the best investments? What is the best way to protect your money from taxes?

"You never know what's going to happen to you, your children or your grandchildren, " she said. "Families encounter illness, death, divorce. Things come up unexpectedly, so you'd better be prepared."

Last year, she started Grandparents for Grandparents, a group of 20 women in the New York area who are educating themselves about all things grandparent. Among the group's members are seven alumnae of the 008 club, including Carol Safir, a Realtor and the wife of Howard Safir, the former police commissioner of New York; the philanthropist Jane Bishop Shalam, whose husband, John Shalam, is chief executive of AudioVox, a consumer electronics maker; Judith Ripka Berk, chairman and chief executive of the Judith Ripka Companies, a jeweler based in New York; and Gloria Gottlieb, an insurance agent at Nemco Brokerage Inc. The group has been meeting once a month, bringing in experts to discuss issues that relate to being a grandparent. The group also invests money and donates the profits to charities that help grandparents.

Ms. Terman Felenstein said grandmothers were no longer relegated to just "stirring pots of chicken soup."

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